The 10 most common reasons marriages fail. For most couples, the thought of marriage makes them feel giddy, happy, warm and fuzzy inside. Unfortunately, most people also believe that when a marriage ends in divorce, it is because something went wrong.
The reality is that things almost always could have been avoided if a couple had only known why marriages fail. While none of these reasons guarantees impending doom for your marriage, knowing the most common reasons marriages fail can help keep you from entering into a doomed relationship.
When people think of the most common reasons marriages fail, they often think of infidelity. This is not the case for most marriages. In fact, infidelity accounts for only about 10% of the biggest issues that lead to divorce. From lack of communication, to financial troubles and on to various other issues, it’s no wonder so many couples are heading for divorce.
Why do most marriages fail? A lot of factors are at play here. You cannot take one thing alone, like the fact that two people have kids in a marriage and expect it to last long. Fact of the matter is that all these reasons work together to create an unstable marriage.
When a marriage ends in divorce, both parties involved often wonder how they got there. Over the years, I’ve talked to many married couples and divorced individuals about why their marriage failed, and every marriage is different.
Some of the reasons for divorce are related to cultural influences and societal expectations, while others are due to lack of understanding, proper communication, or a simple unwillingness to make the commitment.
Read more article: How to Earn Trust in a Relationship
- 10 Most Common Reasons Marriages Fail
- Is it better to leave or stay unhappily married?
- Why do people stay married if unhappy?
- When should you walk out of marriage?
- How do I know if my marriage is worth saving?
10 Most Common Reasons Marriages Fail
Married couples are known to go through some tough times on their journey to marriage. This can be due in part to external pressures like stress, family responsibilities or conflicts at work. The marriage could also be dealing with internal problems such as issues relating to the partners’ personalities, values, roles, and gender identity.
The reasons for divorce vary from couple to couple, but there are some general themes that run through most divorces.
Here are the ten most common reasons marriages fail
1. Lack of Communication
Communication is critical in a marriage, and when it breaks down, so does the relationship. Couples who don’t communicate well with each other often find themselves avoiding conversations they need to have or never having important discussions before they become major problems (i.e., money).
When you’re not communicating with your spouse, it can feel like you’re not on the same page as them, or even worse: like they don’t care about what you have to say at all.
2. Trust Issues
Trust is an issue that affects many marriages, and it can be difficult to rebuild once broken. If you feel like your spouse isn’t trustworthy, whether it’s because they’ve cheated on you or lied to you, then trust issues are probably already a problem in your marriage.
If this is the case, communication will be hard because there’s already a lack of trust between both partners. If trust has been broken and rebuilt before and if there are still trust issues between both parties involved in this new marriage, then be honest about how you feel about the situation and try to resolve any issues that may arise from those feelings before they get too serious and affect your relationship negatively overall.
Infidelity is one of the most common reasons marriages fail. It can be difficult to deal with infidelity when you’re married, but it’s even more difficult if you’re in a long-distance relationship. When it comes to cheating, some people say that they don’t care if their partner cheats on them as long as they remain friends afterwards, but this isn’t realistic.
If you find out that your partner has cheated on you, you’ll probably feel hurt and betrayed by the person who promised to love and cherish you forever; plus, there are other complications that come with finding out about an affair after it’s already happened.
4. Financial issues
Another common reason for divorce is financial issues or debt problems. While money isn’t everything in a relationship, it does play an important role in how partners view each other’s contributions to their lives together as well as how they feel about their financial future together (or lack thereof).
If one spouse isn’t pulling his or her weight financially, then this could lead to arguments between spouses over who is responsible for paying bills and buying groceries.
5. Having different interests and values
If you have different interests and values than your spouse, then this can lead to problems in the long run because it can cause resentment or anger between the two of you over time if not addressed properly right away by talking about the differences and trying to work them out in a positive manner instead of letting them fester until they do not get resolved.
6. Lack of trust
If one spouse does not trust their partner enough to tell them everything about themselves, then this can also lead to many problems within their marriage as well as their relationship as well when it comes down to trust issues between each other. So if you want your marriage to last, then it is important that you have a healthy amount of trust for your spouse.
7. Different goals for the future
If you and your spouse have different goals for the future, then it’s possible that one or both of you may end up unhappy in your marriage because you won’t be able to achieve what you set out to achieve together.
8. Different parenting styles
If one parent has a different parenting style than the other parent, then this can lead to conflict within the family unit if not handled properly by both parents. It’s important that parents have similar parenting styles so that they can agree on how to discipline their children and raise them in the best way possible.
If they don’t agree on certain things when it comes down to raising their children, then this could lead to major problems within their marriage as well as their relationship with each other as well when it comes down to raising their children together as a couple.
9. Lack of commitment
One of the biggest reasons why marriages fail is because one or both spouses do not really want to commit themselves 100% into their marriage or relationship anymore because they have lost interest in each other or maybe they just don’t feel like being married anymore for whatever reason that may be.
10. Abuse or violence
Abuse doesn’t just mean physical violence; it can also include emotional abuse like putting down your partner’s appearance or intelligence when they don’t meet your expectations as well as verbal abuse like making threats or name-calling if they don’t do something you want them to do. Read more article: Signs your partner is disloyal
Is it better to leave or stay unhappily married?
There are many reasons why people stay in unhappy marriages. They may feel that they don’t have the financial means to leave, or they may be concerned about how a divorce will affect their children. Some people stay because they hope things will get better, while others are afraid of being alone or feel trapped by their own sense of obligation.
A happy marriage is one where both partners feel loved and supported. If you’re in an unhappy marriage, you can’t expect someone else to change or fix all your problems; it’s up to both partners to make the relationship work.
In order to be happy, you need to be able to deal with the reality of your relationship rather than pretend that everything is fine when it isn’t.
If you’re considering divorce, remember that it’s never easy or simple. There are always consequences for everyone involved, including any children who may be part of the equation.
Before making any decisions about divorce, talk about what each of you wants out of life and make sure that you both know what those needs are before making any decisions about ending your marriage.
If you’re unhappy in your marriage, that doesn’t mean it can’t get better. But if you’ve tried everything and nothing has worked out, then maybe it’s time for a divorce lawyer.
If you’re going through a rough patch in your marriage but don’t want to get divorced, there are some things you can do to improve things for both of you:
Talk about what’s bothering you. Don’t just assume that he knows what’s wrong, tell him what it is and let him respond.
Don’t blame him for everything that goes wrong; instead focus on solutions together. Blame won’t help anything at this point; instead make an honest effort at finding solutions together so he feels like he has more control over his life again.
Try not to nag or criticize too much when discussing issues; instead try using “I” statements when talking about how something makes you feel or why an issue bothers you so much.
Why do people stay married if unhappy?
There is a difference between being unhappy and being unhappy enough to leave. Most people who are unhappy with their marriage stay because they don’t want to hurt the other person, or because they don’t think it’s worth the trouble of getting divorced.
There’s no need to get divorced if you’re not happy in your marriage, but you also shouldn’t stay in an unhappy marriage if there’s no chance of making it better.
If you are staying married because you’re worried about what other people will think, or because you don’t want to give up your comfortable lifestyle, then perhaps it’s time to reconsider whether your relationship is worth saving at all.
There are many reasons why people stay married if unhappy. Some of these reasons include:
Many people believe that the best thing for their children is for their parents to stay together.
Fear of being alone.
People who have been married for many years may fear being single again after so many years in a committed relationship.
If one spouse is making significantly more money than the other, they may worry that they will not be able to support themselves if they divorce.
When should you walk out of marriage?
Marriage is a commitment. It’s supposed to be for life. And yet, divorce rates are still high, and the number of marriages ending in divorce is higher than it ever has been before.
So when should you walk out of marriage? Should you even consider walking out on your marriage?
There are many reasons why a couple may feel that they should separate. Here are some of the most common:
If you’re being assaulted or threatened with violence, this is not acceptable and you must leave immediately. You can call the police or contact a crisis hotline for help.
This includes verbal put-downs and other forms of humiliation or control. If your partner is making you feel bad about yourself on a regular basis, you need to get out of the relationship before things get worse.
If one partner controls the money in the relationship and keeps the other partner from having access to it, this is a form of abuse. It’s also possible for one partner to spend money without consulting the other one first, or borrow money without repaying it, these can be signs of financial abuse as well.
If your spouse has sex with others without your consent or forces you into having sex when you don’t want to, then there’s no way that marriage can be healthy for either of you anymore.
Emotional infidelity is often easier to overlook than physical infidelity because it doesn’t show up on Facebook posts or text messages like physical affairs do; however, if your partner is emotionally involved with someone else, it’s time to consider moving on.
If money is tight and your partner can’t manage his finances, it may be time for him to go. Financial problems are difficult enough for couples who are working together to solve them; if one person is not interested in managing the family budget, that’s a sign that things aren’t going to get better any time soon.
Family members can become intrusive and pushy when they get involved in a relationship. Unless they have the best interests of both partners at heart, they may try to break them up or force them into marriage when they don’t want to marry yet.
If this happens early in your relationship, it’s probably not a good sign, especially if your partner allows his parents or siblings to dictate how he lives his life.
How do I know if my marriage is worth saving?
If you’re like many people, you’ve been wondering how to know if your marriage is worth saving.
You love your spouse, but the challenges of life have caused trouble in your relationship. You’ve both let the passion fizzle out and now you’re having trouble just getting along.
The problem is, neither of you wants to be the one to say, “It’s over.” So you keep on going, hoping things will get better. But things don’t get better, they get worse. You’re stuck wondering if there’s any hope for your marriage at all.
Many people are in this situation and often wonder if it’s even worth trying anymore. But there is hope! The key to knowing if your marriage is worth saving lies in understanding what makes a great marriage work.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself to help determine if your marriage is worth saving:
1. Are you both committed to working on this marriage? If so, how will you do that?
2. Is your spouse willing to take the first step toward improving the marriage? How will you know if he/she is sincere?
3. Have you both agreed on what needs to change in order for things to improve between the two of you? What specific changes do each of you need to make?
4. What would each of us lose if we separated permanently or divorced (e.g., children from your union)? What would we gain by staying together (e.g., financial security, religious beliefs)?Read more: can-a-relationship-work-if-you-are-not-in-love/
We don’t want to see anyone divorced, but it would be refreshing for this day and age if we were honest about the true causes of divorce. For sure, there are plenty of very complicated reasons for divorce, and certainly there are reasons that are unique to every marriage, individual, and couple.
But it’s imperative that we talk about these basic husband and wife relationship killers. Most people won’t know about or understand that the problems they’re having just might be in the Top 10 Reasons Marriages Fail list above. Honest communication is essential to staying married and keeping your spouse interested in being married. Read more article: Things couples should do before getting married